yesterday was beautiful
do you ever feel worthless?
like nothing you do matters.. like no matter what step you take its going to be wrong..
ever wonder what the fuck the point of it all is? why you’re here in the first place, why so much shit happens to you all the time? why you put up with it..
i mean its not like i can just end it. although don’t get me wrong, that’s about the only thing i want to do right now.. end it. snuff it out.
one moment of pain perhaps. then endless sleep. no more worries or problems or struggle or heart ache. no more feelings of being completely and utterly alone.. but no, cant do that. have to go on another day. i just wish i could motivate myself to do anything other than cry and feel this rage. this anger building inside of my body. i’ve never felt this rage so strong in me before. it scares me.. idk what i’m capable of anymore.. i just know i hate when i get like this. i shut everyone off.. i just want to fade away… i want someone to show they care… force me to snap out of this.. let me cry on their shoulder.. let me cry, let me yell and and scream.. and i just want to be told its okay, it’s okay to feel this way to be mad, hurt, angry, depressed.. i just want some comfort.. i just want to not feel like this anymore.. i just want to go.. to go away. slowly fade from the memories of those who even do care.. the list is short.
i just wish i could get some fucking sleep.
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In memory of Zahra Baker.
title: Little girl lost
little girl lost
where has your smile gone
my darling sweet darling
wont you tell me what is wrong?
your lips curl up but the smile isnt true
what happend my sweet child
what’s happened to you?
illness has taken a toll
on your body so it seems
yet the light in your heart
has oh! such a gleam.
but lately you seem distant
so far away
please don’t leave us
no, not in this way.
little girl lost
there is no more light
something’s been eating you up
you seem so full of fright
we miss that glow
and the warmth you would bring.
it’s too late to save you
oh the woe my heart does sing.
I won’t let you be forgotten
i wont let you fade away
little girl lost
you are in my heart to stay.
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